Your Mid-Week Self-Esteem Boost

Real talk. When’s the last time you’ve questioned yourself, or felt a little insecure? Whether it was five minutes ago or five weeks ago, we all know the feeling of being consumed by a seemingly endless spiral of self-doubt. Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about how we all define self-worth, and why we can sometimes be so hard on ourselves. After pillaging the depths of the internet and having plenty of conversations, I’ve come up with a few ways to reframe how we think about our self-worth and boost our self-esteems…

1. Reattribute and relax
Have you ever gotten bad vibes from someone and then immediately started to question what you did wrong or why they didn’t like you? Let’s say your new boss was a little short with you when you asked him or her a question. You’d probably feel like a disappointment right and then and there, but would you have stopped to really consider the fact that they might just be stressed about something else? I’m in no way advocating for people to use their stressors as a cop-out, but for the sake of thinking of considering our self-esteems, we have to acknowledge that this happens fairly often.

 Usually, we internalize the issue, and assume that the negative interaction was entirely our fault. Attribution Theory provides a decent explanation for this phenomenon – instead of attributing the other person’s behavior to outside forces, we assume that the behavior is rooted in an internal dislike for who we are. Of course it’s hard not to take these situations personally, but the next time you’re getting weird vibes, don’t automatically blame yourself!
2. Always a lesson never a failure
These words are more than just a tattoo that I happen to know Rihanna has on her collarbone (don’t judge me for knowing that…), they constitute a very valuable mantra for how to look at the misfortunes that tear at your self-esteem. We get into trouble when we let our disappointments hold too much weight and define us. We can’t let the letdowns in life become central to our identities! Instead, use those fiascos as fuel to hustle even harder.

That promotion you really wanted, but didn’t get? Use it as a chance to self-reflect. The relationship that didn’t work out? Now you’re that much more prepared for mister right! At the end of the day, you can’t always control what happens to you, but you can control your reaction to these things. Choose to learn from these disappointments and continue thriving like the girlboss you know you are.
3. Altruism at its finest

I’m sure we’ve all heard of “helper’s high” before. It’s a term used to describe the feeling of euphoria that we experience after doing a good deed. Helpers high not only brings a rush of endorphins, but also puts our character into perspective and impacts the way we view ourselves. Being altruistic serves as a reminder of our inherent good nature. You don’t have to commit a lot of your time or energy to experience the benefits of being altruistic either! Some of the most effective practices include complimenting someone or simply smiling. So go out there and show some kindness…as much as you’ll be helping others, you’ll also be helping your self-esteem!


I know that there are times when it feels like your self-esteem is taking hits left and right nonstop. We all go through it. Sometimes we just need to lovingly nudge ourselves to remember how great we are!

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